Post by Tammie on May 24, 2006 10:38:43 GMT 10
ACTUAL BULLETIN BLOOPERS
*"Anyone who submitted their own photos for the church directory may pick them up in the office. If you would like them nailed to you please contact the secretary." (ouch)
*"The Ladies Weight Loss Class will be holding a food drive for the church pantry next month."
*"We have agreed to sponsor six Somalian refugees. Volunteers are needed to help torture survivors."
*"The benevolent committee is working to help a family that had most of their belongings destroyed in a fire. In addition to general household goods they specifically need a washer and dryer and a mattress for a queer size bed."
*"The youth group has a couple of students who need assistance with homework. We have a special need for a volunteer Math tudor."
*"We will be serving a meal for the homeless at the Cooperative Ministries Outreach Center. There is a poster is in the narthex where you may sign up to be a sewer for the meal or bring food items."
*"The fitness center wellness program provides a condominium of care that has been beneficial to several of our seniors."
*"The paving company says they should be here to stripe the back parking lot Wednesday. Therefore, there will be no puking on the back lot during Wednesday night's activities. Trustees will be on duty to see that this is enforced."
*"The Thursday evening Bible Study Group will be working on Jobs during January and February."
*"The Senior's Fitness Group has found that dedication and constipation are the key to any successful exercise routine. For information joining the group please contact the office."
*"Anyone who submitted their own photos for the church directory may pick them up in the office. If you would like them nailed to you please contact the secretary." (ouch)
*"The Ladies Weight Loss Class will be holding a food drive for the church pantry next month."
*"We have agreed to sponsor six Somalian refugees. Volunteers are needed to help torture survivors."
*"The benevolent committee is working to help a family that had most of their belongings destroyed in a fire. In addition to general household goods they specifically need a washer and dryer and a mattress for a queer size bed."
*"The youth group has a couple of students who need assistance with homework. We have a special need for a volunteer Math tudor."
*"We will be serving a meal for the homeless at the Cooperative Ministries Outreach Center. There is a poster is in the narthex where you may sign up to be a sewer for the meal or bring food items."
*"The fitness center wellness program provides a condominium of care that has been beneficial to several of our seniors."
*"The paving company says they should be here to stripe the back parking lot Wednesday. Therefore, there will be no puking on the back lot during Wednesday night's activities. Trustees will be on duty to see that this is enforced."
*"The Thursday evening Bible Study Group will be working on Jobs during January and February."
*"The Senior's Fitness Group has found that dedication and constipation are the key to any successful exercise routine. For information joining the group please contact the office."
