Who holds the purse strings in your house?

[violet]

Unless it's for him, dh hates spending money. He thinks that every bill that arrives has been sent just to annoy him, that food should cost next to nothing and that clothes and medical care are optional.

Because he gets so strung up about the cost of things, I do the bills. I don't especially enjoy paying for the electricity or whatever, but we have used it! I turn lights off, turn things off at the power point/wall plug and use compact fluorescent globes where possible to keep the bill down, but don't begrudge the electricity company their money like he does!

Years ago we came up with a split - he keeps the "big" savings account going, plus gets a big chunk for his expenses, I get money to run the household expenses. His salary is credited into various accounts automatically, one that he controls, the rest are my domain. Being me, I spend very little on myself, but I think lots of women are like that.

[cara]

I am right there with you Violet. Same here..

[mom2jdd]

Marty rarely spends any money other than the bills. . . I'm the spender here

That being said. . over the years we've done various things with the money and bills-- simply because it was easier. .. . I used to pay all the bills on my day off each week. . . .

Then when Marty got sick and was home every day-- he paid them.

Now we work out the budget together each month. . . and pay the bills together.

[braided-rug]

I do them mostly.

[lynn]

He does. My reason? Pure and simple logic.....if I made a mistake we would NEVER hear the end of it....but if he handles all the finances, I don't have to worry about it.....don't ask me how I figured that one out.

[violet]

Sounds good to me, lynn!

Actually I should add that dh is not great at projecting things. He thinks that if the gas bill has been paid, then that's it. He is quite outraged when another one arrives two months later lol.

Years ago we had to pay a big chunk of money to the tax department. Now the reason was that he'd sold some shares and had made a big chunk of money, so it was all fair, I thought, but he was really annoyed about it. The day before he had to sign the cheque, his hand swelled up. Honest! I couldn't believe it, and then the next day, when signing the cheque, his hand was shaking as well. He just hates spending money on things he doesn't want to spend it on!

[braided-rug]

Maybe we are generous or fatalists or something. I get upset with electricity bills especially if it is the main source of energy in the house. I have been able to get it down though. If it is around $500 I get stressed. Years ago the gas was averaged out at so much per fortnight for the whole year and you paid that each time to the gas company. We only had electricity for lights etc.

Our wood is free. However, now we have started buying newer chainsaws etc. That seems a major commitment. Safety was the major issue.

[daddys3chicks]

DH pays all our bills and is in charge of the money. We were both married before, so when we first got married we had separate checking accounts and split the bills. Finally, we got a joint account and I paid the bills. He complained about "where does the money go" - so I turned it all over to him.

The financial issues in our family (the bankruptcy) were a combination of both of us - not talking - spending - getting loans etc. But, in the past 6 months ro so, I have realized that, at least in our family, giving up the finances is part of my role as the wife. So, I check with DH before I spend any money. He writes everything down in the checkbook he keeps.

I know some women would have a cow if they had to do it this way. But, I really feel like God has led me to turn it all over to John, and utlimately to Him. John really needs to feel like he is in control. He does a good job with the money, if I don't spend.

[violet]

Br I think we're either fatalists or perhaps realists, when it comes to bills. Also, I think most of the gas/electricity companies will still let you average out your bills and pay that way. I have a friend who does it. There's also this: www.postbillpay.com.au/billmanager.asp
which sounds good. You probably know all this stuff anyway.

Cheryl, money can be such a fraught issue that I think it's really important that we are comfortable with whoever is running the books, and for you guys it's your dh. Sounds good to me, and it's one less thing for you to worry about!

[braided-rug]

Sounds good Cheryl. It is the right thing after what you have been through. It is hard to explain what I mean. Its all good anyway. Making the decision is probably the hardest, hope it is getting easier.

[braided-rug]

I had a system like postbillpay when dh worked at the factory. I was really organised there. Thanks for the link, I had a quick read, I was curious about it.

I still have an account I could do a similar thing with and do use it from time to time. I do have a really large bill due around Sept.

I find I am bad with small amounts now and like to do things in a larger scale while still saving for the big things. I use a Christmas Club for some of it, not a money one, but for food and other items.

[lucie]

Pierre pays the bills and I'm the one who buys the groceries, clothes for kids, gifts for everyone, etc...when we need to buy something big or expensive we talk together about it.

We do talk alot about our finances together, even if he pays the bills. We budget and plan together.